Shoujoai ni Bouken: Adventures of Yuriko

The Story so Far: Yuriko, renowned rake and idol, has embarked upon a new assignment for a "reality" TV show, posing as a senior in high school. While Yuriko has learned about the lives and loves of those students around her, her own personal time has been cut down considerably. The weekend so far has offered cold comfort, but she is eternally hopeful.


Volume 1, Issue 10

"Just Relax"


The alarm hadn't rung. Yuriko smiled into the pillow happily, lazing in the comfort of her bed, for a solid second before she shot up in a panic. She was late! Halfway to the bathroom before she realized this was Sunday, Yuriko paused, not sure whether to go back to bed, or just get up. A glance at the clock convinced her that bed was that appropriate choice. She was asleep before her entire body was prostrate.

The room was dark. The weather outside must have been awful. Yuriko smiled. Good. She yawned hugely and indulged in a long and luxurious stretch. Rolling over, she mourned the absence of a gorgeous Greek reporter from her bed, then got over it. Sunday. Never before had that word meant so much to her. She reviewed her plans for the day.

"Let's see," she said out loud for the sake of the plants which lined the windowsill, "today... first call Kishi-san." Yuriko grinned as she pulled the blinds up and looked out upon a dismal grey day. "She's probably chewing nails...I think she owes me a favor, though. I'll get her to send me someone to clean this place." Looking down at one plant, she grinned at it. "Maybe someone cute."

Turning, she left the bedroom, and wandered into the kitchen area. She put water on for tea, grabbed a package of English tea biscuits and a hunk of cheese, plopped them on the counter and hunted through the drawer for a pen. In between cutting slices of cheese and laying them on crackers, she wrote herself a list.

"First," she said, her mouth full of cracker and cheese, "Kishi-san." She glanced at the clock. Nine-thirty. She'd call in half an hour. By then Kishi'd have had her morning coffee and be slightly less prickly.

The water was boiling. With plate of crackers and cheese and cup of tea, Yuriko seated herself at the counter. "Second," she sipped the tea, "bath...long bath." She sighed again at the thought of missed opportunities. "Third..." she paused, looking around the apartment. She shrugged. "Homework, I guess." She made a face at the list. "Bleah."

Aya-san had done a number on her yesterday, so in addition to her regular classwork, she had extra Japanese work for her tutor. What joy.

"Anything else?" she asked the room at large. Her eyes fell on the pile of love letters. "Oh." She took a deep breath. What the hell was she going to do with these things? Ah well, she'd leave them for later.

"Fourth," she said decisively, "scripts." There must be a better offer than playing a high school kid in the pile. She finished her tea and crackers, brought her dishes into the kitchen. Looking at the full sink, she resigned herself to at least a little housekeeping. By the time she had dried and put away the last cup, it was time to call her agent.

"Kishi," the gruff voice said. "Whaddaya want?"

Yuriko laughed, she could just *see* her agent, neck deep in paperwork, sucking on cigarettes and pretending that her clients weren’t the reason for her having a job in the first place.

"I’m just checking in!" she said, extra perkily. She could practically hear Kishi’s teeth grind across the phone lines.

"It’s about time." The sound of Kishi sucking in a lungful of nicotine. "Don’t you answer messages anymore?"

"I’m sorry," Yuriko imbued her voice with as much genuine apology as she could. "This assignment has been *really* time consuming…" Kishi’s snort didn’t faze her at all. "and my answering machine seems to be broken." She stuck her tongue out at the phone. Take that, you old hag.

"Can I ask a favor?" Yuriko’s voice was sugary. "Can you hire someone to drop by my place, say twice a week, and give it a cleaning? School and clubs take up all my time these days."

Kishi grunted, which Yuriko took for an affirmative. Having got what she wanted, Yuriko was all sweetness and light, her voice conciliatory as she acquiesced to her agent’s every demand. She set her media schedule for the next week - paying close attention that she not be pulled from math class this time, and was ready to ring off, when an idea struck her.

"Kishi-san, I wonder, I have a small problem - maybe you can give me some advice about it."

She could hear the sound of the older woman choking and waited the sarcasm out politely. At last Kishi asked her what it was.

"Well, not surprisingly, I’ve been getting a lot of love letters…" she raised her voice over the sound of her agent’s laughter, "and I’m not sure what to do with them. Any suggestions?"

"Sure," Kishi gloated, "Pick the cutest one for your prom date."

Yuriko’s eyes narrowed. "Very funny."

"Okay, okay, I’ll see what I can do about it…I’ll talk to the kids who answer your fan mail."

Yuriko let out a grateful sigh. "Thanks Kishi-san. I really appreciate it."

The agent sucked in another lungful of tobacco, exhaled and said, "Don’t overwork."

Yuriko smiled at the phone and said, "Thanks. I won’t." But Kishi had already hung up.


Yuriko was a bath enthusiast. When she had first moved out of her family's home, she had lived in a flophouse with three other kids, all with no job, no means of support, and no running water. That relationship hadn't lasted long. Her next residence had been an apartment shared with a drag queen bar hostess, who hogged their small shower. When she hit it big, the one thing she swore she'd have was a big old bathtub in her bathroom. And so she had. The apartment she now rented had rooms that were of average size, but at some point the owner had pulled down the wall to one of the two bedrooms and made the bathroom insanely luxurious. Tiled walls with a mosaic patterned trim...huge frosted glass windows let in a lot of light, and the enormous, plenty big enough for two, furo. Yuriko had fallen in love with the bath at first sight. She sighed happily and leaned back, letting the water rise to her chin.

She loved the way her pale skin turned red after a soak in the tub - she lifted an arm to gaze at the vaguely lobster-like coloring she had taken on. She knew she should get on with her homework, but it all seemed so distant.

"I mean really," she said out loud. It's utterly ludicrous that I'm worried about my grades; she continued the thought, sighing now in irritation.

Rising from the tub, she wrapped herself in a towel, slipped her feet into fluffy pink slippers and scuffed her way into the bedroom.

A few minutes later, she reentered the dining room, dressed in jeans, oversized t-shirt and slippers. Seating herself at the table, she frowned down at her book bag. She pulled out her notebook and opened it at random.

"Translate the following passages into English. Please pay particular attention to the use of prepositions..." Gritting her teeth, she began to work.


Three down. Yuriko picked up the phone and made a quick call. Five minutes later, she was out the door. The rain had stopped, but the air was heavy with moisture. That's all right, she thought, it's still Sunday.


Yuriko kicked the door open, holding her takeout bag in her teeth. Keeping her hands away from the doorknob, she elbowed the door shut and bent to drop the bag on the table.

Some takeout, a pile of scripts to read and newly polished nails. "Life is very good." She announced to the whole world, smiling at her own contentment. "I'm simply gross today." she laughed at her mood.

She seated herself on the sofa, opened one of the scripts and began to shove sushi into her face. It may be ultimately meaningless, she thought, but life really *was* pretty good.